The world is a funny place! Or, at least, a strange twisty dynamic fascinating thing, full of die hard saints and sinners, and the 99 percent of the rest of us are guessing every next step in our ballet of life.
So this piece is for those inspiring girls, and ballerinas, that I love.
I am part ballerina, a bit of a slut, a lot of a tease, a teenager, both really loud and opinionated and also sometimes too shy to speak to people. I stay away from people I consider idiots, or dangerous, but also love causing chaos. I have no special abilities to see anything more clearly than anyone else, and no need to impose my opinions on anyone… So take them or leave them, use them, don’t use them… LOL!
That was the disclaimer… If I irritate you, or depress you, or cheer you up, don’t beat on me too hard, as I will plead ignorance, youth, and catnip fueled kitten-like enthusiasm!
So where to start this one? AnnaBelle’s mom said to keep it short, say what I feel, and let it be a developing discussion. This is really difficult as I normally want to research something until I have a bunch of answers, then think about it, and only then maybe offer an opinion. But in the ballet of life, everyone is guessing! And there are no answers to the big questions that have any guarantees of truth. So to start, in no particular order, a few things I have been thinking about over the past while…that could have been status updates, but not quite.
What is it with the whole global crusade about pedophiles? I don’t deny that there are some really greasy people out out there, and there are definitely predators hunting children. But all of a sudden it seems like people think that there are pedophiles in every corner and under every bed! It is almost like they are the new Hollywood bad guy, after the Russians went bankrupt, and the Arabs ceased to be stereotypes. As bad guys we even had hideously fake sounding “South Africans” for a while, until that collapsed under the weight of its own stupidity. So maybe Hollywood and media needed a new boogie man?
I am not defending the greasy bastards of the world, but how many are actually out there?
I have been lovingly raised and trained to be a complete tease, and I am probably a fairly good target for the dodgy buggers of the planet. At one stage when I was newly allowed online, I even decided to let myself to be more of a target, if that would protect the innocent girls that would soon be preyed on by hordes of slavering drooling reprobates. So I was prepared to take one for the team in the interests of innocence, and maybe at least distracting a few predators long enough to keep some unknown innocent, innocent.
Yup, maybe a bit of a martyr complex, but I was raised that way, and it made sense at the time.
I was hit on by a bunch of ludicrous loins (sic), and the loons would always start by asking my age, sex and location…asl. As if they couldn’t see I was a girl and young, and in South Africa. Can we say not observant? Really mindless queries or passionate platitudes followed, for about an hour, until it was completely obvious even to zombies, that they were wanking off about how deviant they were.
At that stage the Internet was full of guys pretending to be girls, hoping to strike up a friendship with a real girl, so they could share deep dirty secrets… And just about every second budding young “slut” professed an undying love for the literature of Nabokov, and listed Lolita as their favourite reading. Apart from the unfortunate truth that most of these apparent young harlots probably couldn’t read, because they definitely couldn’t spell or write, I wonder if any of them ever read Lolita? Not at all the illicit passionate child romance it is seen to be, but rather a well written and boringly slow sad unwinding of sanity and reality into Pavlovian obsession and the realms of pathetic tragedy. Come on kids, can we say Russian comedy? Like War and Peace… I mean really people!
Anyhow back to the drooling boogie men… I was hit on by a bunch of turkeys, and took great delight in introducing male greaseballs to fake female greaseballs, and letting them entertain each other. They were shallow, crude, offensive, but really stupid, and so they were actually harmless and about as scintillating as the real Nabokov novel.
Having discounted the idiots that no ten year old would take seriously, I moved on in search of the cause worth fighting. Thousands of emails later… (What can I say, I was a lonely kid with a fair amount of time around schooling and training) I realized that either for some reason I intimidated the boogers by not blushing and squealing when asked the color of my panties, or, there really were very few real nasty predators out there.
They were definitely there, but amongst the herds of dingbats I encountered only three or four.
They were the ones that kept me awake wondering about the safety of their nearest and dearest female relatives. I wish I could describe some awesome tactic that I immediately performed and thus kept the world safe for peace, democracy and kittens, but that would be a lie. Instead I just really hoped like hell that they were distracted enough by trying to nail me, that their kids and friends kids were left alone…but that is probably wishful thinking.
In another twist, I also met a bunch of guys who would be seen as pedophiles by the rest of the world, but were really sweet, polite and true gentleman. They just felt maybe both fascinated, and more comfortable in the company of kids…and I don’t think that was latent pedophilia at all. Even if the discussion turned sexual there was nothing of the predator vibe, and I think that is an important realization.
So as I see it, and I may be totally wrong, with the global hysteria about evil pedophiles under every kids bed, there needs to be a serious reality check. Yes there are pedophiles, and yes they are truly nasty predators preying on the weak or gullible kids, or those lonely kids desperate for approval or affection. But in the case of any threat or danger, you have to approach it the same way as planning a stunt or performance… and that is to understand the real danger, and with your eyes completely open, and cold logic, plan around it.
I realize that my little blog is turning into a book now, but if you are still reading, bear with me, because if I ended now I would just be another busybody saying we need a plan and so adding to the social noise on the topic.
So we have a real predator threat, and we have a mass global crusade, and in all the social network and media screaming the real danger has been lost in the noise. Approaching it in the only way I know how… as if it were a life threatening stunt, we need to understand the danger before we can plan around it. So we need to know, what is a pedophile? What is the reality… not what media or social watchdogs tell us? I think a good indicator is that predator vibe I referred to. In that, they would share with the sociopaths in the action of self gratification without conscience, and preying on the weaker. Why prey on the weak? It is obvious when you think about it…they are scared to engage socially on their own level, and need to feel that they have a social or mental edge over the girl or boy they are targeting.
I guess pedophiles then either are unable to be intimate normally, or in rare cases just get off on having power over innocence. If it is the social angle, then they are less of a threat if the kid is educated to the existence of boogers, and very importantly, is comfortable with their own sexuality and not made to feel ashamed of it by parents and society. Sex is natural people, and so is being horny! If it is the power over innocence angle, then they are more like a sociopath with a specific interest group. These…are nasty, and difficult to protect against, and so avoidance is the safest. But that needs awareness, and in a culture where anything physical or different is taboo, children are left guessing or are too embarrassed by their bodies and imaginations to ask questions. So awareness goes missing and innocence becomes a target.
So in this step we come to a solution of educating kids, and properly, rather than a bunch of moralistic lectures at them, as that will only drive natural curiosity and self expression into shadows where it can be used as a weapon against the vulnerable.
Our next question after what is the threat, should be how large is the threat? How many are really out there? My guess, is out of a thousand guys, 800 are cool, 100 are dingbats or idiots, 90 look like pedophiles, but aren’t and 10 are really predators. That is my guess though, and it would need proper stats done by science rather than by social bodies with axes to grind and budgets to justify.
My feeling is that pedophiles, while existent and nasty, are less common than the media would have you believe. Does this mean that the threat is less? I don’t think so.
I think it is actually greater because with all the noise about pedophiles and deviant sex, and gays getting bashed…again… we are making a mindless crusade, and are creating a culture of repression and new conservatism in which it is impossible for kids to be curious or sensual or ultimately safe.
We are breeding and then hiding the pedophiles in the hysteria, and setting up their hunting grounds for them in the spinoffs of the crusade.
Crusades historically didn’t work well for religions either.
So the only solution to the second part of the problem that I see, is for adults to be educated too, and chill out, and see what is real and not drive kids curiosity away with shame and fear. More love, more reality, less fear of embarrassment, and fewer kids will be easy victims for the predators hunting the edges of the pack.
Just as a thought, the Japanese comics are full of Lolita type imagery, and some are really violent too, but I hear the stats show really low child abuse and violence. And that poses a new question. Are the ninjas just different, or does allowing self expression of what is, discourage people from acting in it in secret?
My experience was that they are all like “that 12 year old is so hot, I would bang her..” But they acknowledge that that is a fantasy, and the reality is that then they would have to put up with her friends, her family, her Justin Bieber fetish, and her not being an interesting, social and mature person yet. Not that I am yet either, but these are just my thoughts.
Other questions for in future would be, why does society need crusades? Why do we seem to have a need to always try create an “us versus them” because that ends badly every time. Remember people… xenophobia or nazi-ism or genocide is the flipside of national pride and shares the same mechanism, so it can’t be separated from it.
Another question I might look at is with all the crusades, and the fear about the world being a terrible place and going into a hole faster than a trapeze artiste with boxing gloves, or a mole with a fear of heights, is this fear justified or is it an illusion? And if it is an illusion, why?
Nuff for now! Love you all!
BalletGwat 